Forum
Sexy Flanders' Guide to Playing Your First 5k
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Sexy Flanders wrote
at 12:16 PM, Friday May 28, 2010 EDT
1) Lube up you rectum. Make you don't miss any crevices.
2) Get royally fucked in the ass by luck. Lose every attack where you have a one dice advantage. 3) Lose a lot of points. 4) Go to a 500 table and use chat as a way to vent frustrations. Be as verbally abusive as possible to no one in particular, unless it's Ryan, inventor of this game. 5) Write an idiotic post in the Forum. Now that you know how to play a 5k, try it out. It's tons of fun! |
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Sexy Flanders wrote
at 12:33 PM, Friday May 28, 2010 EDT CORRECTION: It should read "Make SURE you don't miss any crevices." I apologize for any confusion caused by this error.
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the full monte wrote
at 1:11 PM, Friday May 28, 2010 EDT is this the first forum post ever that focuses on how sucky a 5k game is without once using the terms pga, otf, or circlejerk? I APPROVE.
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Sexy Flanders wrote
at 1:14 PM, Friday May 28, 2010 EDT CORRECTION: It should read "Lube up YOUR rectum." I was not in the right frame of mind for proper spelling and grammar when writing this post.
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*Macho* wrote
at 1:37 PM, Friday May 28, 2010 EDT I was in that game, and it was indeed a great lack of luck. Still.. it seems you're one more person who'd take points instead of gg.
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Sexy Flanders wrote
at 3:23 PM, Friday May 28, 2010 EDT sometimes yes, sometimes no macho - in that game, i wanted to at least break even - i had a bad spread to begin with, bad luck first round, and it just got worse and worse - it was my mistake for sitting in the first place - and, yes, when it was clear 1st, 2nd, or 3rd were non-options, i'd rather make it out without a huge point loss, especially since I came into the game with only 10k - but, i got destroyed anyway -
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TheTrucingOne wrote
at 3:26 PM, Friday May 28, 2010 EDT Play 10 games at 5k and it will become easier to understand :p i Lost ~25k points to learn 5k basics. Still newbie, but now i dont want to play anymore 500 :)
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MadHat_Sam wrote
at 3:57 PM, Friday May 28, 2010 EDT It will always be harder for newer players on the upper tables for the simple reason that the regulars do not know what to expect from them. Simple logic, go with what you know.
Too many times have I tried working with a newer player only to have to walk them through the game turn by turn or to get screwed over by them because they simply weren't that smart. |
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Gurgi wrote
at 9:58 PM, Friday May 28, 2010 EDT mmmmmmmm lube
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Sexy Flanders wrote
at 3:37 PM, Saturday May 29, 2010 EDT the real trick is knowing how to play with people who don't know you - once you play a couple and don't do anything too fucked up to them, the regulars feel like you're not gonna shit the bed (and fuck they're game), and you got a chance -
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blondes_win wrote
at 6:07 PM, Saturday May 29, 2010 EDT the key to winning any game is not skill, but the chat box. Manipulate people to do what you want, that is what makes up for skill
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